Sad Wife:

What would you do if you had no religion? What would your advice be if your daughter or sister were in the same situation?

The ideology of the CHURCH was written eons ago and has NOT been modified and caught up with modern times!

You know what to do, follow your motherly instincts! You are a strong woman. Good luck.

JMO.

kt

why should we care about the religious ??

go ahead , leave him , divorce him

Sad wife,
I agree with everybody here that you should file for divorce. Why? because you have been unhappy for 20 years with your marriage . Too bad I don't have your husband story so my suggestion is based on your story only. But it doesn't matter
whose fault is, the truth is you don't have a happy marriage.
Before you file for divorce you should consider this:
1/ After divorce your husband will have 1/2 of whatever you guys have. Let's say 20 years living in the US you guys own a house worths 400k. Are you willing to let him spend 1/2 of that on those girls in VN? if yes, then consider this:
2/ After he spends all the money he'll come back to you and say sorry ,will you take him back? ( be careful, he's good on this. remember that you forgave him many times. If you are a
warm-harted person, you'll probably say yes because at the same time he may ask his mom,dad,friends,priest,people in the church...to speak to you in favour of him so you can't say no, then the "yes" in #1 is void, then no divorce).
If no divorce then the next 20 years will be as sad as your nick name in the last 20 years. What else can you do? you said you determined to get a college degree and you got that.
right? Were you happier with the degree? Maybe not. there are lots of happy families out there. How do they do that? They only need to determine to do one thing "to make themselves happy" That's how people put their determination
to work. It look like your husband like sweet girls. Make yourself sweeter than them,then he's going to go nowhere.
Remember this " WHEN YOU CHANGE PEOPLE ALSO CHANGE".

YEAH DONT DIVORCE BECAUSE UR A CATHOLIC IDIOT... JUST BE A CATHOLIC IDIOT FOREVER UNTILL THE DAY U DIE... STUPID TO THE MAX... U SAID U BEEN TO SCHOOL.... THEREFORE WHAT HAVE U BEEN LEARNING AT SCHOOL???? WHERE IS UR MIND AND LOGIC??? WHAT A SHAME... UONG MOT KIEP NGUOI!!!

Be sure your catholic priest is not homosexual or a child molestor.

You are the one who was cheated and hurt, not the priest. Like someone said: There are no victims, only volunteers.

So what, if you are the first in the family to have a divorce?

divorce him there plenty of ppl out there

Old thread.....

Sad Wife,

if your priest like so many other priest were real catholic... they would have adviced you or leave it to you whether to get divorced or not.

Sad wife, there was that girl at the age of around 11 getting pregnant from a raper. Since the girl is too young to give birth to a child, abortion was necessary. But though the girls parents were begging for admission, the church still forbid that girl to get an abortion which mean risk for the girl and the unborn child.
If you would stay in this situation would you listen to the church too?

Sister SadWife,

The priest have adviced you not to get a divorce, however he dídn't say anything about separation .

Why bother with divorce it cost money and so on,,,when you could save that money to take care of your child .

Đối với kẽ bất trung ,,,thì anh đi đường anh , em đi đường em . Thế thôi .

Nếu chị ko còn thương chồng cũa chị nữa đó thì cứ let him go,,,,cho him đi rồi mang bệnh tật về cho him lếch / chết 1 mình đi .

Sis nghĩ nếu sis ỡ 1 mình như vậy liệu sis có giữ thân được không ? ( if you 're a strong Christian gal) that's why i am asking .
Đường đời có nhiều sự cám dỗ lắm sis . Nếu sis resort to separation đó sis ỡ vậy được mà nuôi con thì sis ko có tội gì hết đó,, người có tội là him . But if you cánt and later on you have move into another relationship thì sis cũng có tội adultery luôn .

I do prays that things have been improve and sorted out for you and your family sis + God blesses .

Hello mrs, you live your life, not the the priest. You are catholic doesn't mean that you have to suffer like hell. Isn't it true that god want people to be happy? Please do what your heart tell you to do. I believe that religion do have impact in our life but c'on, this isn't belief any more. This is about reality when your husband is cheating on you, and you are going to listen to that priest?

With all respect, I don't understand why catholic priests are giving marriage advice when they infact have never been married themselves?
What's more intriguing is that married couples go to them for marriage counseling. I guess it would be like having a pro-football coach coaches a team without having to ever played a football game him/herself.
It's different to have the knowledge of what a lemon tastes like than actually tasting it.
It's puzzling to me.

SW:

It's not worthwhile to try and change someone. A leopard doesn't change its spots. Life is too short. Don't waste your time. Be strong and move on. Someday you will look back and say 'that the best thing I've ever done for myself'. Good luck.

PP

calm down hothead, not all priests are gay

i said screw religious monk they alway corrupted and up to no good. Anyone who cheated on you 1 it your bad cheated on you twice it their bad, don't u know that Catholic monks in San Diego just sale the church because can't afford to paid for sex charge again them, monk are just like human some are bad and some are good, and this is 21 century and their are some people still lived with aged old law. I'm glad that i'm not a member of a religious group because u because u just have to their retarted preach and they always try tell u what to with your life but according the real stuff is you life your life not their life what did they know try to being smarty two shoes. Here is something people said about religious in Viet Nam and i think i quite true about To^n Gia'o la` lie^`u thuo^'c phie.^n ru ngu~ da^n to.^c, if u don't want them to be in control you stay away from religious worshiper they are dangerous just like drug.

Usually I wouldn't recommend couples who already have kids together to get a divorce....however...given all the facts that you said.....I strongly recommend you to divorce this man. He likes sweettalk which you cannot do....and that is why he went out and cheated on you from time to time.....I don't think that is a healthy marriage.......

F*ck'n guy needs to get his hands out of little bois' pants and open the door to world of the pain you feel! What a MOFO!

Maybe he should have a SH!T talk with that MOFO hussy of yours!

"su*. vi` thie^n chua' ke^'t ho^p. loai` nguoi khong the^? pha^n ly" from BeTron.
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How about child molestation and child rape of hundreds of Catholic priests? "Thien chua ket hop" those, too?

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"I myself was in a similar sistuation a few year back. My wife commited adultry and I asked 3 priest regarding divorce, thay all told me I should not get a divorced. Well, the fourth priest I talk to at the time was a judge, he told me that now a day it is a bit easier than before. He told me I should get a divorce because it is not a healthy relation any more. He also told me that I can get remarried in church if I explained my situation in writitng when I files the petition for annulment." from Sparky.
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Annulment? What did the priests need to file when they continuously molested one kid after another?

How about getting a job and paying tax like everyone else first.

Wow.. your story sounds like someone who's an in-law that's going through the same thing! I hope we don't know each other..

In any case, even if we do... (you know how Viet families are.. they don't like to talk about 'feelings' and 'problems' too much), one thing that I wish I can say is: "Yes!!" File for the divorce. Why listen to a priest who probably isn't the most perfect person himself? I know we often like to people on pedestal sometimes, but this certainly shouldn't be the time to. (In fact, i would NEVER let the priest be the word of God- I'm not even religious, but I know this for a fact, that your life/happiness are much too important to sacrifice self-worth/sanity for an empty marriage, right??).

Good luck..

Divorce is a big decision to make. You have been endured your unfaithful husband for a very long time because of your husband bad habit. What is done is done and you can not go back in time. You have to keep moving forward and I understanding what you are going through. If you want to keep your husband, then tell him that, "although I am not a sweet talker, but I know how to comfort you...Not anybody knows how to sweet talk. But if the wife loves the husband, then she at least should know how to comfort and understanding him..." Have you and him try to go out as a family vacation together? Encourage him to be the father of your child. It is very hard for the children without the father. If your children still little, then encourage them to play with their father. If they are growing up, then encourage to talk more with their father.